I used to be a big fan of garage sales and flea markets. As a child, I used to love going with my grandpa to the weekly cattle auction which was always preceded by a swap meet. Some of the farmers would fix up old appliances and farm implements, but mostly it was just old junk. Of course my 10-year-old eyes lacked the experience to know the difference between a bargain and a burden, so one time I bought 2 bald tires, a washing machine and broken television for seventy five cents. My grandpa yelled at me and ended up paying the scrap dealer a few dollars to haul it all away. I was sent to the car to learn my lesson, which was the undeniable fact that grandpa was totally loco passing up the huge bargain. Looking back, that was the moment that I actually began my pursuit of the American dream, the accumulation of unlimited stuff. Forty years, three kids and several moves later, I found myself on the other end of the spectrum, and began trying to rid myself of all the stuff in my life. I wish I could say it was a spiritual quest or self improvement plan, but the truth is, I finally just ran out room.
This process was accelerated by the recent decision to put in new floors. We had to move all of the old furniture out of the house and suddenly became aware of how ugly and stupid many of our treasures were sitting in the carport and how disgusting it would be to put them on our beautiful new floors. Most of the decisions were easy; some were a little more complicated. Our biggest dilemma was the old couch/hide-a-bed. It weighed about 25,000 lbs. and the cushions had become soiled to the point where the dry cleaners said “Sorry, we tried but failed.” After even the local mission said “No thanks,” we called the landfill and they said that the regular garbage truck would pick it up if we could get it out to the street. This brought up a whole new set of issues, the first being the fact that while I hated abusing the landfill, I hated having the couch in my carport even more. Secondly, I knew that the lady at the landfill, while convincing enough on the phone, had no real control over what the crews actually did on their route. Our trash day is Saturday, and if they decided to pass on the maroon, striped monster it would be Tuesday before we could take it to the landfill. We don’t spend a lot of time worrying about what the neighbors think, but it seemed kind of tacky to force everyone to experience a Sanford and Son moment every time they passed by. Joel and Lori were leaving for Austin Friday afternoon, so I grudgingly agreed to put it on the street and this where the miracle begins.
After hauling the couch out, Joel took a long look at his old, 7-headed, hydra lamp that seemed so cool in junior high and decided it had to go as well. As he set it by the couch, we noticed how it looked like an actual, tasteless, living room display. We thought it would be funny to add a junky end table beside it and placed an old magazine on the table along with a broken remote control. We stuck an old bicycle on the other side and our “room to go” package was completed. What started as a joke instantly became a clever marketing scheme, and by the time we made it back to the carport, the lamp was gone. I then saw a white Cherokee slow down for a look before moving on. By the time I got inside the house, a Malibu was parked in my driveway and the driver was running his hand over the end table, checking out the finish. He then popped his trunk and began making room for the new addition. As he placed the table into the trunk, the Cherokee circled back and after a brief conference, pulled into the neighbor’s driveway. Some money was exchanged, the men shook hands and the Cherokee driver took the table out of the Malibu and placed it in his own. When I checked back an hour later, the couch and bicycle had disappeared as well. Rarely have I experienced such a satisfying, multi layered experience.It was truly win-win. In one August afternoon, through an act of simple selflessness, we:
A) Improved our living quarters.
B) Saved the environment.
C) Stimulated the local economy and created jobs.
D) Created a spirit of community that transcended race and socioeconomic barriers.
E) Began to explore the possibilities of running for public office.
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